In an attempt to loosely define what I want my D/s to look like with Kare, I've taken the last few months to intellectually explore female Dominant/male submissive relationships. (Kare is roughly pronounced Kah-reh. It is Japanese for boyfriend. I thought it a fitting nickname for him in my journal since he is half Japanese.)
On FetLife, I came across a lovely entry by Ladyservant titled Warrior Submissive.
It is a perspective on male submission that has left an impression on
me and is certain to influence my future D/s relationship.
Here it is, reposted with permission:
I began to resolve this conflict in
the last few years cultivating a personal relationship with the Goddess
or the Divine Feminine and seeing what I worship in Women is also
something within me. However Women embody it in a way that I cannot (at
least not in this life) and so serving and worshiping them is something
that is beyond kinky play or pleasure (which is good ;), its true
worship for me. The other thing I realized in this process is that I do
not have to be weak or disempowered to be a submissive. Submissive is
just a word, it doesn't have one single meaning for everyone.
me the act of submitting to a Woman is as I said an act of worship. The
prerequisite for submission in my life is that I live my life
fearlessly, with courage and strength and even a fierceness. Its easy to
get carried away with this attitude and have it be nothing but ego
which wrecks ones life, just look at our society. The amazing thing is
that when I come into contact with Women that are living as empowered
dominant Goddesses, I am humbled. Their power and beauty and wisdom
naturally make me fall to my knees in worship. Then serving them is a
total act of joy. There is a particular power that Women carry which
after everything I've seen and experienced in my life is the greatest
power I can imagine. So submission is an act of empowerment and courage
for me because when one is at their greatest strength the most fearless
act just might be to surrender to a greater power. Women carry the power
of life itself, the formless cradle of creation which has been called
the Goddess among other things.
For me their is no greater act of a warrior than to serve the Goddess.
While I don't believe in Female Supremacy (or any type of supremacy
based on gender, ethnicity, nationality, etc) as this article somewhat
suggests, what I do like about it is the insight into male submission.
Many people - both outside and inside the kink community - tend to view
male submissives as less than masculine. They are often portrayed as
weak and insecure at best or incapable and pathetic at worst. It
disgusts me that a man who would choose to submit is often assumed to be
less of a man than his "alpha" counterparts.
dislodges those stigmas. This male submissive is a gentleman, a soldier,
a protector and a provider. He is proud and functioning and capable. He
is empowered through his submission and not ashamed to express the awe
and respect he has for the deserving women around him.
I dig it.